(he wants me)
and i enjoy making him wait around for me, hope, wonder. is that horrible? i hate it when a boy does that to me, and i've never done this to one before... and here i am messing with him in the same way that generally makes me cry some nights. maybe cause he has no feelings. or cause we won't turn into anything more than a good makeout (would we??? is it even really good if it's not leading into something special- trust, loyalty, genuine care??) is it human nature to shun others when we've been turned away from? or is this just me? i feel in control for the first time in a few months- i'm not the one waiting . ok, i am, kinda, but at the same time i'm focusing on keeping this guy just far enough away to keep asking for more. the tables turn... (it looks the same over here though...)
pictures to come.
i have a huge crush on clint eastwood. i want a cowboy (or at least a cowboy in spirit. no wranglers, thankyouverymuch)