Wednesday, October 29, 2008
ever realize you've been trying real hard for something (or maybe somebody, maybe yourself) and you realize maybe it was a bust from the beginning? maybe you knew that all along... just in denial as usual...
i hate those moments of realization- sometimes they come in a series of a 'well that figures' and a 'of course's and you just chalk it up to bad timing, better luck next time... before you finally get enough of the little kick-in-the-ass instances that you figure if you don't walk away now you'll end up down in a gutter somewhere. i don't know if this makes sense...
why does it always take me so long to get to that point? cause anyone who knows me knows this ain't the first time.
and why do i still not want to face it, why do i still want to try?
cause that part of me will probably never change, i'll probably never slap myself and figure that people will let you down, you will let you down, life will let you down sometimes. i guess cause sometimes randomly, things get ironed out... on one part of the sleeve at least.
(i'm off to explore fall with the 50 mm that i've started to love)